Kindness in the Face of Bullying
October is Anti-Bullying month. Let that sink in. Bullying is such a problem in our society, that we dedicate a month to combating it. This week in our kids’ school, they’re asked to participate in Kindness Matters Week by wearing a certain color each day or by doing random acts of kindness. While this is great and brings awareness to a problem, is it really solving anything?
In my opinion, no. Or at least it’s difficult to see. Maybe that’s because we are dealing with a bully in Adelaide’s class. As a mom, it is heartbreaking to see your child that LOVES school and has been asking to go since she could talk, cry almost every single day before school.
When an Active Voice Doesn't Deter Bullying
Since the start of the school year, which she was so excited for by the way, we have noticed a dramatic difference in Adelaide’s mood and behavior. Even friends and family have noticed. It’s a big problem. My happy, bubbly little girl is now moody and withdrawn. We occasionally catch glimpses of the old Ads, but we want our girl back all the time.
What’s a parent to do when your child comes home upset day after day? We try to teach our kids to advocate for themselves. “Use your big voice and tell her you don’t like when she say/does ____.” Or, “if that doesn’t work, tell your teacher.” “Ignore her.” “Play with other kids in your class.” We have tried all of that, but apparently it is still happening.
Standing Up for Our Kids
The teacher side of me doesn’t want to be “that mom.” But the mom side of me wants to nip it in the bud immediately. So, I emailed the teacher and we’ll be meeting Adelaide’s teacher to discuss this bullying situation, and also the academics. That’s another story – girlfriend is bored out of her mind in school this year and we need to figure out if it’s related to the work or something else entirely. But I digress. The bully situation is first and foremost the situation that needs to be addressed.
I’m in unchartered territory here and I don’t know what to do to help my child. I know she needs to do some figuring out on her own, but when you see a dramatic shift in personality, it goes deeper than what a 7-year-old can handle on her own. So, dear readers, help a momma out! What would you do if you were in our shoes? How do we navigate this horrible journey? Share your experiences (hopefully you don’t have any, but given we are recognizing October as Anti-Bullying month, I know we aren’t the only ones).
Answers to Bullying Aren't Immediate
We don’t have all of the answers now, but we’ll share any results moving forward. Our number one priority is our children’s well-being, so we’ll do whatever we need to help. Hopefully, we can give her the tools to deal with similar interactions in the future. We’ll keep you posted, friends.
It’s not easy being a parent when you feel that almost every day involves some level of frustration. There’s that sense of your kids feeling that same frustration. But as a parent, you’re also balancing the line of strict versus lenient. When in all reality, you just want to show them that you love them unconditionally, so they’ll know that when they succeed or struggle with that thing called life.